Men: These 5 Confidence Boosters Will Help to Supercharge Your Male Display
Posted: Friday, July 23, 2010
by Mike Pilinski
Kipling Kat Publishing Co.
For all you guys out there who are having a difficult time attracting the romantic attention of women, one major reason for this could be due to your lack of a confident male display. This is that invisible and silent "vibe" that you are always sending out about yourself to females everywhere. If your own male 'love beacon' has been broadcasting a weak and unappealing signal that's been getting you nowhere lately, then you need to boost up the strength of this Love & Romance energy field and make it shine with the light of unstoppable courage! This is essentially the master seducer's secret to success: quietly capturing the interest of a woman away from the men who surround her with his A+ male display, and then gradually monopolizing it until he's got her completely hooked into him.
1) The #1 mental gear-shift that can almost instantly improve your outlook on most everything and make you appear more confident to everyone involves creating a brand new mental Confidence Frame for yourself... and then plastering it all over your reality!
What am I talking about? A confidence frame is a highly personalized LENS through which you view the world. It's a mental filter -- a "coloring" that determines your perception OF (and reaction TO) what's going on in your presence. Your confidence frame is more than just an academic exercise however, it tends to constrain what is or isn't viewed as possible for you to achieve by setting limits beyond which you've convinced yourself that you cannot venture. Your confidence frame operates by overlaying a veneer of assumptions across whatever it is that you're witnessing -- and it's those personal limitations that determine the sorts of "safe" interactions that you can engage in with any particular situation or person.
You can think of this as the invisible boundaries defined by your fear.
Here's how it works: two people standing side by side viewing the same reality will apply entirely different biases (assumptions) to what their seeing, and thus create completely different (even totally OPPOSITE) interpretations of that situation. For instance, I see a girl standing there and I think that it's possible for me to walk up to her and get a conversation going, and you think that this isn't possible for YOU to do. Neither one of us is actually right or wrong in a strict sense -- and our "overlay of assumptions" may have little to do with our actual chances of making this happen anyway, since it cannot take into account the one big 'unknown'... if she would even be remotely interested in either one of us!
What it DOES do however is position us to either take or withhold a particular sort of action based upon our applied bias to this neutral observation of a girl who's just 'standing over there'. This GO / NO-GO decision point (and you live through several of these each day) has the potential to change the trajectory of your life to some major or minor degree -- depending upon what you actually decide do... make a move, or simply allow the moment to pass.
The built-up weight of these kinds of collective choices, in retrospect, are what determines where you are in your life right now -- which is essentially a patchwork of all these decision points both big and small that you have made along the way. Sure, some of the reality of your world may've been imposed upon you by the actions of others or by circumstances beyond your control, but a lot of it wasn't. It is mostly our own choice to be where we are today (even if the main "chooser" was our fear). People with a social anxiety phobia for instance have applied a strong negative bias to most every aspect of their reality, which thus colors their world through a prism of abject fear. You should strive to stay out of this deadly trap of fear-based decision-making and begin coloring YOUR world through the lens of limitless possibility.
2) Get all the people who "know" you as being sad, depressed or lonely OUT of your life. I'm serious. Do whatever it takes (short of anything violent) to diminish the supporting effect they are having on the psychic MONSTERS that you are trying to flush out of your skull!
The people around you can often feel threatened by any sudden change in your attitude or physical state -- especially if those changes are life-enabling for you. Such personal changes threaten to have you moving "out in front of them" in terms of where they imagine you to belong in their own personal pecking order (which is usually somewhere beneath you, of course). I'm talking about work, school, and especially within your own family structure. You need to begin casting a more critical eye upon these individuals and begin grading them for their usefulness to you. Don't assume that these people have your best intentions at heart, they often do not.
In my books I talk extensively about male status and becoming the "high status male" in order to begin attracting the kind of high quality women that you desire into your world. People who can support you rather than drag you down. Well, you cannot feel that you are high status in any sense of the word if you are constantly being put down by the people that surround you. These individuals act as physical manifestations of the poisonous thinking that's going on inside your head. They re-enforce your circular rotten thinking, and they need to go!
3) Dump good old "schmootie" or "titso" forever. Or whatever other sort of cutesy, put-downish nickname that others may've stamped you with over the years. Think about some of the more powerful and respected people that you know of. Do they get these sorts of stupid nicknames hung on them? Do people dare call them by it to their face... or are they afraid of the consequences? Or maybe just too respectful? Again, as noted in confidence booster #2, this sort of thing represents all the external inertia present in your world which works against your making any sort of positive, uplifting changes in your life. This is entirely toxic to the free and full expression of your existence. Get rid of it! You have 2 choices here: face these people down or flee them. Either method will work -- although the first has the added benefit of improving your self-esteem enormously.
I realize that the number of people we could be talking about or the pervasiveness of their low regard for you may make this seem like an impossible task, as you could be vastly outnumbered by these agents of psychic doom. Regardless, you must revolt against their endless tyranny and seek your own mental freedom!
4) Taking a major mulligan (a "do over") on your life can be thought of as your next really big confidence booster... in the sense that you will ultimately walk away from such a fearful experience a VASTLY stronger person. Especially if you're in the 20 to 40 age range reading this right now, you will be thanking your lucky stars that you took up the challenge of personal self-change when you did because it only gets tougher as you get older and more set in your ways and attitudes.
I'm talking about seeking out a completely new circle of friends where you can finally get some emotional support. This may mean having to discover entirely new social circles, changing schools, your place of employment, a spouse... or maybe even the radical decision to pack your bags and leave town. It all depends on just how much importance you are willing to give this crazy idea that having some RESPECT from others (and also from somewhere deep inside your own head) is worth more than the safety and security of holding onto your current crummy life situation.
It means looking the risk of building a new life for yourself straight in the eye... and refusing to blink!
5) Know and understand the critical importance of long-term MOTIVATION when mounting any sort of major challenge to your well-established routines and habits -- and especially when trying to break out of calcified old thinking ruts. Your brain has made subconscious assumptions about the limits of possibility for you. It has spent a lifetime subtly directing your thoughts and behaviors in ways that create a supporting reality... thus "proving" everything it believes about you to be "true".
These profound if poisonous self-created assumptions can get themselves buried in very deep -- and can therefore take a very powerful commitment of motivation to reverse. Attempting to just casually sweep these rooted-in ideas aside in the service of more positive ones will likely be regarded as a THREAT to the very existence of the subconscious itself... and so will be viciously resisted at every turn. This is why it can be so difficult to remain motivated to stay at positive personal change until it finally begins to take hold, but this is the task that you must now shoulder. Otherwise, this is a process that runs almost hypnotically and unconsciously unless you deliberately force it to STOP.
Finally, whether it's something physical like losing weight or quitting smoking, or something completely psychological like changing your fundamental belief system, you'll find that Courage and Self-Awareness are your best friends for remaining in the fight long enough to achieve the kind of boost in confidence that you are seeking. Just stay true to yourself -- and stay in the fight no matter what sort of blowback you encounter. Remember that no one can prevent you from having anything that you truly desire in life. Except you.
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